Sunday, January 31, 2010

One Single Impression: Blowing the Curve

Don't do what I did: keep both feet on the ground!

To read more poetry, click the graphic or

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Friday, January 29, 2010

LOL Cat Bible: Lectionary Readings for the Fourth Sunday after the Epiphany, January 31, 2010

Fourth Sunday after the Epiphany
January 31, 2010

Jeremiah 1:4-10
Psalm 71:1-6
1 Corinthians 13:1-13
Luke 4:21-30




Jeremiah 1:4-10

4 Ceiling Cat sed:
5 "Oh hai! Befour I maed u I knew u. U pwn n ur a prophet, k?"
6 I sed "No wai!"
7 Ceiling Cat sed "Wai! Do wut I tells u!
8 Dun worry, I can help."
9 Den Ceiling Cat touched me an sed, "I'm in ur mouf, givin u werds."
10 Nao u maekz stuff an braekz stuff, k?

Psalm 71

gud ceilin cat, u has kept me in teh snugglez ov ur luv thees lotz da yeers.
uve totally saved me lot ov tiems 4 REALZ.
ize comin 2 u lotz tiem when they all try 2 taek away mah cheezburgers!!!
i wuz always frum birf doin wut ceilin cat wantd.
but teh bad onez dat wants 2 taek mah cheezburgers when i wuz kitteh r still her an they try 2 find ways 2 RUIN EVERYTHIN 4 ME!!
nao i iz bout 2 dye srsly!!!
i wants luv from u ceilin cat.
i iz yelling dat ur teh bests totally i meen it an shout loud an i iz hopin u will gimie cheezburgers.

funny pictures of cats with captions
1 Corinthians 13:1-13

1 iff i talkd wif teh tungz of manz n angylz, n duzzn haz luff, i are becom liek teh human, knockin down all teh potz n panz frm teh shelf, srsly.
2 iff i haz powarz of liek tellin the futurez an if i has access to teh internets, an i gotz all teh missteriez an all teh knowingz an all teh faithz, enuff 2 taek all teh mowntanz awayz, an i duzzn haz luff, i gotz nuffink.
3 an evn iff i givez all mai stuffz awai, n iff i delivur mai bodiz to b burnded up, and i duzzn haz luff, i gotz nuffink.
4 Luv is pashient n kind, luv haz no jelusniss or showin offz, luv no is stuck-up
5 or r00dz. Luv no insistzes on doin it 4 itzelf, itz not pisst off alla tiem or rezentflufflele.
6 Luv izzn all happiez about doin it wrong, but is happiez about teh truthz.
7 Luv putz up wiht all teh stuffz, beelivez all teh stuffz, hoepz for all teh stuffz. Luv putz up wiht all teh stuffz... i sed that areddy?
8 Luv no haz endingz. Tellin the futurez, tungz, an alla stuffz u know wil die.
9 We haz knowingz a bit, an we haz profacy a bit. We no haz two much tho.
10 O, wait. Win teh perfict coemz, teh not perfict will dyez, lolol.
11 Wen i wuz a kitten, i meweded leik a kitten, thinkded liek a kittenz, an I chazed strings liek a kittenz. Wen i wuz becomez a cat, i NO WANT kitten waiz ne moar.
12 For nao we see in teh foggy mirorr like when teh human gets out of teh shower, but tehn we see faec tow faec. Nao i haz knowingz just a bit, tehn i will haz all teh knowingz, as i haz been knownz.
13 Nao faithz an hoepz an luvz r hear, theses threes, but teh bestest iz teh luv. srsly.

Luke 4:21-30

21 an Jebus wuz all "Dat comed tru todai. I iz in ur synagog, fulfillin ur professeez."
22 Evribodi wuz all "What a niec kittn. Hez Joesphz kittn riet?"
23 Jebus wuz all "Now u iz gonna sai 'Doctor, treet urself! Do sum miraclz heer liek u didded in Capernaum.' "
24 "U no whut, no proffett iz popular in hiz hoemtown.
25 When Elikhat wuz aliev, dere wuz lotz of widowz whaer he lived.
26 But Ceiling Cat didint send Elikhat to enni of dem. He sended Elikhat to a widow in Zarephath insted.
27 N when Elisha wuz aliev dere wuz all kaindz of leperz whaer he livd. (Leprz haz a skin dizeez calld leprosi, it is nasti). But teh onli wun Elisha healded wuz Naaman teh Syrian."
28 Dat pissted evribodi off.
29 Dey throwd Jebus out of town an draggded him up a hill. Dey wuz goin to thro him off teh clif.
30 But he jus walkted thru teh crowd an lefted LOL.

funny pictures of cats with captions

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Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Pretty Pansy

Pansy is making wonderful progress. She is happier in New Hampshire and spends a lot of time with us. She talks to us, demands doors be open and snacks be given. She is relaxed and glowing. How gratifying to watch her glow!


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Sunday, January 24, 2010

A Slumber Party

Left to right: Buddy, Pansy, Zorro. Possum does not ever join the pile but will sleep close by on the bed. I thought this was a pretty good capture! Click on the photo to see the full size photo in order to see Zorro in mid-yawn more clearly.

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Christmas 2009


From the first Sunday of Advent, when I baked the communion bread until our tree (cut out back) came down on Three Kings Day, we had a very quiet and meaningful Christmas.

The advent wreath was made by a church member from a traditional design with boughs and herbs from the New Hampshire forest. Every item had a meaning. Prayer shawls were laid under the flowers on the communion table. I heard the organ for the first time. Christmas Eve service was especially memorable as John and I attended together.

We had ham on Christmas and shrimp on New Years. The cats enjoyed the tree and only took a few ornaments and part of a string of lights off of the tree. They especially enjoyed sleeping under it. John said it reminded them of being in the woods in the summer.

We had a lot of snow during Advent. The cats were dismayed at this, but would venture out on the deck occasionally for the fresh, cold air.

I took few photos. But there are enough here for me to always remember our first Christmas. I hope yours was peaceful and joyful.

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LOL Cat Bible: Lectionary Readings for the Third Sunday after the Epiphany

Third Sunday after the Epiphany
January 24, 2010

Nehemiah 8:1-3, 5-6, 8-10
Psalm 19
1 Corinthians 12:12-31a
Luke 4:14-21




Psalm 19

1 ok guyz so liek dat hole in ceiling makez me worship Ceiling Cat.

2 evry nite he iz liek come into hoal n watch me masturbate n stuffz.

3 He nevar talkz or makez noize

4 but I no he watchez n mebbe vidyo tapez. Hole in ceiling == Ceiling Cat'z home.

5 In moarning he iz liek "4 shayme" but lukz happy n e wai.

6 No lolcatz hied from hiz watchingz.

7 OK so wat Ceiling Cat sez goez. He iz alwais rite.

8 liek srsly alwaiz. u lissen u be happyz and den it can be hugz time.

9 Ceiling Cat alwaiz fair n stuffz. liek alwaiz bow 2 him.

10 Srsly! moar want Ceiling Cat commandzmentz than cookiez or cheezburgerz!

11 Dey makez me smartcat n I getz prezentz foar obaying liek at crissmus!

12 we all haz invizible errorz but Ceiling Cat fixez dem withowt voiding warranty. plz be mah geeksquad, Ceiling Cat!

13 n dun let meh bez evul on porpoise. den I beez purrrfect.

14 OK srsly Celing Cat! Plz luv me n givez meh cheezburgerz. kkthxbai

Basement cat does not  sparkle in sunlight
1 Corinthians 12:12-31a

12 OK dis part iz deepz. Teh bodi is jus wun thing, but it gotz lotz of partz. Jesus is liek dat.
13 We all hadded a baff and maded us wun church, no mattr who we wuz befor.
14 Liek I sez, teh bodi haz lotz of partz.
15 If teh paw sez "I quit teh bodi LOL," dat not meanz it stopz bein part of teh bodi.
16 An if teh ear sez "I iz not a eye, I quit," it duzint stopz bein part of teh bodi eithr.
17 Imagine if teh whoal bodi was an eye LOL. U cudnt hear nothin. Or if teh whoal bodi wuz an ear, u cudnt smell.
18 Ceiling Cat putted teh bodi togethr in a sensibul wai.
19 If dey wuz all teh saem teh bodi wud suk.
20 So mani partz, wun bodi, k?
21 Teh eye cant tell teh paw "I dont need u!" An teh hed cant sai to teh pawz "Go awai."
22 Teh weakist partz of teh bodi iz not opshnlz.
23 An teh partz we thinkz iz nasti is importnt too. Evn if we duz not show dem to evribodi.
24 Ceiling Cat maded teh whoal bodi, even teh nasti partz,
25 so evri part is ekwil OK.
26 If wun part hurtz evrithing hurtz. Or if wun part feelz gud, u getz teh idea.
27 U iz teh bodi of Christ. Evri wun of u is part of it.
28 In teh church Ceiling Cat haz leadrz, den peepl who tellz teh fyoochr, den teachrz, den mirakul wrkrz, den healrz, helprz, middl manijmint, n translatrz.
29 Iz evriwun a leadr? A fyoochrtellr?
30 U getz teh idea, evribodi iz differnt.
31 U shud want teh good prezentz of cors. Now I will showz u teh best wai.

funny pictures of cats with captions

Luke 4:14-21
Jebus getz chaesded out of Nazareth LOL

14 Jebus wented back to Galilee.
15 He teachted in teh synagog an evribodi liekded dat.
16 Den he wented hoem to Nazareth an wented to teh synagog liek he alwaiz did.
17 Sumwun gived him teh book of Isaiah an he lookted up teh part dat goez:
18 "I gotz teh Holy Spirit,
bcz Ceiling Cat pickted me
to giv good newz to deh poor peeplz
an giv freedm to peeplz in jail
an siet to teh blind
an get evribodi treetd bettr
19 an sai this be the year of teh Ceiling Cat's favr."
20 He givded teh book bak. Evribodi was starin
21 an Jebus wuz all "Dat comed tru todai. I iz in ur synagog, fulfillin ur professeez."
22 Evribodi wuz all "What a niec kittn. Hez Joesphz kittn riet?"
23 Jebus wuz all "Now u iz gonna sai 'Doctor, treet urself! Do sum miraclz heer liek u didded in Capernaum.' "
24 "U no whut, no proffett iz popular in hiz hoemtown.
25 When Elikhat wuz aliev, dere wuz lotz of widowz whaer he lived.
26 But Ceiling Cat didint send Elikhat to enni of dem. He sended Elikhat to a widow in Zarephath insted.
27 N when Elisha wuz aliev dere wuz all kaindz of leperz whaer he livd. (Leprz haz a skin dizeez calld leprosi, it is nasti). But teh onli wun Elisha healded wuz Naaman teh Syrian."
28 Dat pissted evribodi off.
29 Dey throwd Jebus out of town an draggded him up a hill. Dey wuz goin to thro him off teh clif.
30 But he jus walkted thru teh crowd an lefted LOL.



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Monday, January 18, 2010

Sadie Ran Away Again

This is Sadie, the gun shy dog. She lives in Barton. You may remember her from when she left home in 2008 while folks were target shooting near her home. Her owners were away and Sadie was running in fear around the area where I lived. We took her home and kept her until her owners returned home, unperturbed by Sadie's disappearance.

In early November John and I returned to Barton so that John could roof the house. Guess who returned on Saturday morning for a visit? Sadie. On the first day of hunting season. And her owners were away again. But this time, instead of leaving the garage open for Sadie, they had just left her out in the open. It had snowed the day before, yet Sadie was just left alone with a frozen water bowl.

Sadie and I returned home to my Barton house and I allowed her to run free. But Sadie found the chickens, who were outside scratching in the grass for bugs. Sadie behaved at first but eventually she began to run the chickens down. She had to be restrained, so she was locked up in my car with her food and water (which I had taken from her owner's porch).

We left phone messages for the owners and hand written notes on their porch. We called their vet, who refused to help, and the animal control officer, who was away for the weekend. Sadie had to stay with us. We debated keeping Sadie but John and I don't want a dog and Amy and Matt had enough dogs.

Eventually, the ACO came home and on Monday authorized Sadie's overnight stay at the vet's kennel. I hope Sadie's owners value her enough to protect her better. She deserves much better in life.

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Blackwater Beavers

We took a walk, in late fall, along the Blackwater River across the road. Close to home we found amazing evidence of beaver activity. The quantity of wood cut and of beaver sign was just great. The first three photos are of trees that the beaver had cut, trimmed and abandoned for the time being.

Below is a photograph of something of which I had no previous knowledge: beaver and/or muskrat escape holes. Among the wood debris the beaver had left behind in the woods was this hole in the ground. There was water in the bottom of the hole. Beavers or muskrats use holes like this if they are caught on land. They can jump down the hole and escape to the river even though it is quite a distance away.


In the photo above, you see what appears to be a road. My back is to the river here. I pivoted and took the photograph below, where the road ends in a slide into the river. This is a beaver road that they use to drag their trees and limbs to the river and then float them to their dam. I saw the huge dam they had built but I couldn't photograph it well enough to illustrate it here. At some point I know we will return and perhaps I'll get a good shot then.



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Sunday, January 17, 2010

Pansy's Violent Love

Pansy the Crippled Cat has always had a thing for Buddy. She follows him around, sleeps as close to him as she can, and even wrestles him for love. If a human girl ran down her beloved, hit him full force in the belly with her head and, when he dropped to the ground, she jumped on top of him and demanded to be kissed — well, that's Pansy. Buddy is pretty wary of her advances and often runs away from her. But sometimes he acquiesces and gives her kisses :


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They Are All Bad Cats

In November, for John's birthday, I made him a vanilla almond birthday cake with butter cream icing. It was a perfect cake with the frosting perfectly swirled. I had never made such a perfect cake. I even stuck two Reese's peanut butter cups on top (they are his favorite candy). I then left the kitchen to do other things in the rest of the house.

Later, John went into the kitchen and asked me why I had not frosted the cake. But I had and I rushed out to see what he was talking about. The cats! They had gotten onto the counter, all of them, and licked the frosting off of half of the cake!

We ate the cake (those of you with cats understand this; those of you without cats no doubt think it disgusting). But we had to continuously hide it from the cats. My cats have never (hardly ever) stolen food from the kitchen counter. Even Pansy the Crippled Cat managed to get up to get her licks in! So why this frosting? It is pure butter and sugar. The recipe is here on my recipe blog. John likes this recipe because it is not sickening sweet. I guess the cats agree with him.

I have lost the cake recipe so I cannot share it with you. I also can never make it again until I find it.

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Communion Bread

I made the communion bread for church for December (and am hoping to do it every month in the future) and I'm proud of the results of the rustic recipe from King Arthur Flour. After the breads have cooled over night, I take the crust off of one and a half of the loaves. I cube the bread. The half loaf that remains is partially cut through. The pastor uses this half loaf and pulls it apart for the congregation during communion. The cubed bread is divided into two piles, one pile for each aisle in church.

In my denomination, the United Church of Christ (Congregational), we have communion on the first Sunday of each month. Every person is invited to participate, so we want to be as inclusive as possible. This recipe is sugar free, which hopefully will be acceptable for diabetics.

The King Arthur bakers have a blog now, and this wonderful and versatile recipe can be found at the No-Knead Crusty White Bread blog post. It is perfect for chili or soup. You can make it all different shapes and textures. This really is the easiest bread you will ever make in your life! Try it!

The recipe is adapted by the King Arthur Bakers from Artisan Bread in Five Minutes a Day: The Discovery That Revolutionizes Home Baking

But this bread is not gluten free.

Since I had never made bread without gluten (can it be called bread if it does not have gluten?), I bought a Red Mill gluten free bread mix. I followed the directions religiously. Even though the dough of the gluten free loaf felt like a pile of bird seed, I was hopeful that it would be a good alternative for the gluten free folks. It actually smelled quite good in the oven. But it was quite a disappointment. It was nearly impossible to determine when it was finished baking. It was nearly impossible to slice. And it was impossible to eat. It was tough cardboard. We tossed the gluten free loaf out for the birds. It is still there to this day, buried in the snow. The birds won't touch it.

I'm definitely going to buy the book from which my communion bread recipe came. I'll have fun this winter trying all the quick rustic breads. You can't err when making these simple breads, so don't be intimidated by bread making. Click the link below!


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