Friday, May 28, 2010

LOL Cat Bible: Lectionary Readings for Trinity Sunday, May 30, 2010

Trinity Sunday
May 30, 2010

Proverbs 8:1-4, 22-31
Psalm 8
Romans 5:1-5
John 16:12-15



Proverbs 8:1-4, 22-31
Teh Call ov Wisdum

1 Wisdom uses ALL CAPS
Understanding iz also uses ALL CAPS
2 She iz all like "OH HAI" on topz of a hill
She iz rite by teh roadz
3 She iz in ur cityz,
at yur doorz, olwaiz yuzin ALL CAPS
4 She sez "OH HAI, DOODZ
I IZ SPEAKIN TO U, DOODZ - ALL OF YUZ!!!SRSLY
22 CEILING CAT MAKEDED MEH FURST - BEFOR NETHIN ELSE WAZ MAKED.
23 I WAZ MAKDED FRM OLWAYZ - BEFORE TEH URF WAS HERE.
24 I WAZ BORNED WHEN DER WAZ NO OSHUNS, NO WATERS AT ALL.
25 BEFORE NE BIG MOUNTENS R HILLZ FUR CLIMBING WAZ MAKED I WAZ BORNED.
26 BEFORE TEH URF WAS MAKED R NE OF TEH DUST DAT MAKE KITTEHS SNEEZ I WAZ MAKED.
27 I WAZ MAIKEDED BEFOR CEILING CAT MAIKEDED HIMZ OWN HAWSE WER HE LIVZ FUREVUR WIF ALL GUD KITTEHZ HOO IZ DED - WEN HE MAKEDED TEH SKAI ON TEH URFS I WAZ DER - SRSLY I SAWDED IT WIF MAH OWN IEEZ.
28 I SAWED TEH CEILING CAT PUT TEH LEFT OVUR SHEEPS UP IN TEH SKAIZ AN DEN HE MAIKS DE WATERS DAT SHUUTZ UP IN DE SKAIZ AND MAIKS EVURYFING ALL WET - HE CALL DEM FOWNTANZ
29 DEN I SEEIZ HIM MAIKING DE LANDZ SO TEH KITTEHZ CAN STAY DRIEZ - CAWZ TEH KITTEHZ NOT LIEK TEH WATERZ NO WAI!!!.
30 DEN TEH CEILING CAT HE LET ME HALP HIM AN DIS MAIK ME VEWEE HAPPI
31 AN I LIEKDED TEH PEEPELZ TOO DEY MAIK ME HAPPI AZWEL.

Psalm 8

1 O Ceiling Cat,
u iz pretty ossum!
Ur cool n in teh ceiling.

2 Bebehs and kittehs drinkin milkz
dey sey dey liek u,
cuz u pwn teh noobs n stuff.

3 When im in ur outsied, lookin at ur heavns
stuf you maed wif ur own pawz
liek teh mun and teh strz
dat u put der

4 I wantz to no why you liek me and oteher lolcats.
Why you talk 2 us? srsly.

5 Ainjels is moar importent than us but only a littul.
You gives us lots gloriez and onnorz
and stuff that we can has on our hed.

6 We can has control of cheezburgers.
They has to listin to us cuz u sed so!

7 Aminals too.

8 And also burds and teh fishus too.

9 Ceiling Cat,
u is maed of win and ossum.

funny pictures of cats with captions
Romans 5:1-5
Happy Kittyz Wehn Dogz Bark

1 Lissenup, youse yammerin, wez miawing bout Ceiling Cat anna Kitten Jebus,
2 we seez Invisible Water Dish anna graze inna littrboxz, anna miaw-miaw to da Ceiling Cat.
3 More d00dz, webe yammerin bouts Tribbles, anna Trouble Wit Tribbles (datbe da Staw Twek, Season 2, Episode 15) makus gud catz;
4 anna keeps doon it, nice earz; anna nice paws, noses.
5 Miaws summore, slavin ta Ceiling Cat iz gud an youse bin miawin to da Hover Cat, gud fur youse, srsly.

funny pictures of cats with captions
John 16:12-15

12 i haz lots to say, lotz moar than u can hear rite nao.
13 but teh HovrCat iz coming, an he iz going to show u all troofs. he only speakz what he heerz frum ceiling cat, and mite even tell u teh futurez!!
14 he bringz teh glory to me cuz he takez my stuffz and showz it to u.
15 all teh stuffz teh Ceiling Cat haz iz mine and dat iz why i said teh HovrCat iz going to take my stuffz to show u.



Weekend Cat Events
Get ready now cuz the wild weekend is coming!
Board the Friday Ark at The Modulator (submit your post here)

Weekend Cat Blogging
(see the week’s& host to enter your WCB post in the comments for the weekend roundup)

Bad Kitty Cats Festival of Chaos
Optional Theme
(submit your post here)

The Carnival of the Cats
(submit your post here)


1 comment:

  1. may ceiling cat bless all teh kittehz and even teh dogz yes even teh dogz. ceiling cat powns all and nothing powns ceiling cat

    ReplyDelete

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